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How to Say Anything to Anyone: A Guide to Building Business Relationships That Really Work

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Take charge of your career by taking charge of your business relationships and communication skills. We all know how it feels when our colleagues talk about us but not to us. It's frustrating, and it creates tension. When effective communication is missing in the workplace, employees feel like they're working in the dark. Leaders don't have crucial conversations; managers a Take charge of your career by taking charge of your business relationships and communication skills. We all know how it feels when our colleagues talk about us but not to us. It's frustrating, and it creates tension. When effective communication is missing in the workplace, employees feel like they're working in the dark. Leaders don't have crucial conversations; managers are frustrated when outcomes are not what they expect; and employees often don’t get positive feedback or constructive feedback. Many of us remain passive against poor communication habits and communication barriers, hoping that business communication will miraculously improve--but it won't. Business communication and relationships won’t improve without skills and effort. The people you work with can work with you, around you, or against you. How people work with you depends on the business relationships you cultivate. Do your colleagues trust you? Can they speak openly to you when projects and tasks go awry? Do you have effective communication skills? Take charge of your career by eliminating communication barriers and taking charge of your business relationships. Make your work environment less tense and more productive by improving communication skills. Set relationship expectations, work with people how they like to work, and give positive feedback and constructive feedback. In How to Say Anything to Anyone, you'll learn how to: - ask for what you want at work - improve communication skills - strengthen all types of working relationships - reduce the gossip and drama in your office - tell people when you’re frustrated and have difficult conversations in a way that resonates - take action on your ideas and feelings - get honest positive feedback and constructive feedback on your performance Harley shares the real-life stories of people who have struggled to get what they want at work. With her clear and specific business communication roadmap in hand, Harley enables you to improve communication skills and create the career and business relationships you really want--and keep them.


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Take charge of your career by taking charge of your business relationships and communication skills. We all know how it feels when our colleagues talk about us but not to us. It's frustrating, and it creates tension. When effective communication is missing in the workplace, employees feel like they're working in the dark. Leaders don't have crucial conversations; managers a Take charge of your career by taking charge of your business relationships and communication skills. We all know how it feels when our colleagues talk about us but not to us. It's frustrating, and it creates tension. When effective communication is missing in the workplace, employees feel like they're working in the dark. Leaders don't have crucial conversations; managers are frustrated when outcomes are not what they expect; and employees often don’t get positive feedback or constructive feedback. Many of us remain passive against poor communication habits and communication barriers, hoping that business communication will miraculously improve--but it won't. Business communication and relationships won’t improve without skills and effort. The people you work with can work with you, around you, or against you. How people work with you depends on the business relationships you cultivate. Do your colleagues trust you? Can they speak openly to you when projects and tasks go awry? Do you have effective communication skills? Take charge of your career by eliminating communication barriers and taking charge of your business relationships. Make your work environment less tense and more productive by improving communication skills. Set relationship expectations, work with people how they like to work, and give positive feedback and constructive feedback. In How to Say Anything to Anyone, you'll learn how to: - ask for what you want at work - improve communication skills - strengthen all types of working relationships - reduce the gossip and drama in your office - tell people when you’re frustrated and have difficult conversations in a way that resonates - take action on your ideas and feelings - get honest positive feedback and constructive feedback on your performance Harley shares the real-life stories of people who have struggled to get what they want at work. With her clear and specific business communication roadmap in hand, Harley enables you to improve communication skills and create the career and business relationships you really want--and keep them.

30 review for How to Say Anything to Anyone: A Guide to Building Business Relationships That Really Work

  1. 5 out of 5

    Katie

    The whole time I read this book, I wanted to go out and purchase three more copies and give one to each and every boss I've had and attach a special message personally from me in the front cover. So that they can't regift this book and feel obligated to read it. Boss 1. Here's a great book on communication. It's okay to open up to your team and let them know you're going through a rough patch. It's also okay to pull me aside and tell me when I've done a good job, and when I'm doing an awful job. The whole time I read this book, I wanted to go out and purchase three more copies and give one to each and every boss I've had and attach a special message personally from me in the front cover. So that they can't regift this book and feel obligated to read it. Boss 1. Here's a great book on communication. It's okay to open up to your team and let them know you're going through a rough patch. It's also okay to pull me aside and tell me when I've done a good job, and when I'm doing an awful job. Conversely, way to go for having weekly planned out meetings were we can communicate and effectively show how much we care and want to do better at our jobs. I wish this was done with our whole team and not just managers. But props, for carrying out these meetings effectively and really always having a good positive attitude and optimistic outlook during each meeting. Boss 2. I read this book, and couldn't help but think of you. Man, do you have some amazing managerial qualities. You took the time to have one-on-one sessions with all your direct reports EACH MONTH! You took the time to get to know each of your direct reports - not just their work qualities, but personal qualities as well. You didn't take offense when someone came to you with a complaint or were upset at you for how you "ran" things. Instead, you intently listened and tried to make the situation better. And you really showed concern for people you managed. However, you are a bully! What were you thinking when you decided to start talking about people behind their back? Do you really think it's appropriate to manipulate situations to get EXACTLY WHAT YOU WANT. Regardless of the people you have to knock down in the way? Do you think it's funny to make fun of someone's religion, race, sexuality, and gender? Do you say crude things to your wife at home like the jokes that you tell in Team Meetings? As a manager, you are superb. But as a human being you are disgusting. Get a grip on respecting others for who they are. And just like if someone comes to you with a concern about the way you are managing, and you patiently listen and try to change, maybe it would be nice if you tried to adapt this to people's individualities. It made me sick to my stomach to remember some of the things that you would say about people "in private" or "confidence." This affected your work too much and it shows that you really have insecurities for you to say the things about others that you did. Including me, after I left. Too bad some people in life always have to have a scapegoat. You can't change everyone, but through good communication, you can improve relationships enough to motivate them to love working for you. That is why you need to read this book. Boss 3. I have no kind words for you. When you say you're going to promote someone. You do it. And stop telling them time and time again. After hearing from you SEVEN times I would be promoted, it just got old. Be honest. Work Hard. Stop hating Women. It was cruel how women had to come ask your permission to go pump breast milk. As if you had something more important for them to do at the time. And thank heavens you said yes. How cruel to say no. Do you know what it's like to feel engorged. While you would take four thirty minute breaks throughout the day to go get sodas with "the boys." And making fun of your team for changing diapers, and taking time off work when they had a baby? Seriously, stop hating women. Start being honest. Start actually working hard. Coming in early, leaving late doesn't necessarily mean you are working hard. And you need this book to learn how to communicate. Stop telling me I am doing awesome, great, superb, haven't ever had an employee as great as me... and in my exit interview telling me everything contrary to what you said the whole time I worked for you. I was confused why i never got promoted, never got recognized, never progressed. And it's because you didn't want to have the tough conversations that I needed to make me a better employee. You have some serious women-hating, non-communicating issues that need to be addressed. And hopefully this book can help. Whoa. I feel better now. And that's why I liked this book. It helped me realize what I need to do to be a better employee and what I could have done to avoid such negative feelings towards (mostly two) my bosses. P.S. I may just still send the last two bosses this book. With my personal notes on the inside. Obviously, if I remember these issues years later - then they were significant issues and need to be addressed.

  2. 5 out of 5

    Buzz

    With this book I learned how to tell someone they smell in a nice way.

  3. 5 out of 5

    Henk-Jan van der Klis

    In How to Say Anything to Anyone Shari Harley presents a Guide to Building Business Relationships That Really Work. Key concept: candor. Candor is making a commitment to talk about things as they happen, not 6 months after the fact. When candor’s missing, gossip, tensions and secret agendas arise. Many of us remain passive against broken, indirect communication habits, hoping that things will miraculously improve? Unfortunately, that will not happen. It takes stills and effort to lead 360 degree In How to Say Anything to Anyone Shari Harley presents a Guide to Building Business Relationships That Really Work. Key concept: candor. Candor is making a commitment to talk about things as they happen, not 6 months after the fact. When candor’s missing, gossip, tensions and secret agendas arise. Many of us remain passive against broken, indirect communication habits, hoping that things will miraculously improve? Unfortunately, that will not happen. It takes stills and effort to lead 360 degrees. Be the change you want to see in the world around you. How people work with you depends on the relationships you cultivate. So build trust and rapport, avoid gossiping, give and receive feedback in an orderly manner and without prejudice. Set relationship expectations, assume less and ask much more. What do your colleagues or boss expect? Will your approach be accepted? Take action on your ideas and feelings. It will make the workplace a happier place to stay and business relationships last longer. Harley repeats her messages often, both in formulas, steps and crafted cases and real-life stories, which makes her guide boring at times. Nevertheless these lessons can’t be practiced enough. From a simple ‘thank you’ after receiving feedback, avoiding a cc: email culture to an intentional introduction in a new job.

  4. 5 out of 5

    Steven Perry

    This book has a little bit of everything in it when it comes to communication. It is geared towards to business relationships, but you could apply these principles to negotiating, personal friendships, talking with family members, etc. There are plenty of examples on how to become bolder and build relationships with others. Some of the concepts may sound simplistic but being bold and executing is where "the rubber meets the road". It is a short enough book that it doesn't overstay its purpose bu This book has a little bit of everything in it when it comes to communication. It is geared towards to business relationships, but you could apply these principles to negotiating, personal friendships, talking with family members, etc. There are plenty of examples on how to become bolder and build relationships with others. Some of the concepts may sound simplistic but being bold and executing is where "the rubber meets the road". It is a short enough book that it doesn't overstay its purpose but short enough that you could easily go back and reference certain situations. I firmly believe applying the principles from this book will build stronger relationships with others.

  5. 5 out of 5

    J Crossley

    Many times we don’t communicate honestly because we are afraid of what people will say or we are concerned with how people will react. That is why most people don’t know what others really think of them and their contributions. A good practice is to begin every business relationship by inviting the exchange of truthful opinions with respect to the task at hand. Another good practice is to specify how you would like to interact with other people before the difficulty comes up. Also, don’t guess a Many times we don’t communicate honestly because we are afraid of what people will say or we are concerned with how people will react. That is why most people don’t know what others really think of them and their contributions. A good practice is to begin every business relationship by inviting the exchange of truthful opinions with respect to the task at hand. Another good practice is to specify how you would like to interact with other people before the difficulty comes up. Also, don’t guess at people’s reactions. Encourage them to express their thoughts and frustrations.

  6. 5 out of 5

    Matthew Wynd

    A solid plan for a difficult task One of this books strongest features is proving guidance on how to establish candid communications within business relationships already established. The author lays out an achievable set of norms that anyone can reasonably integrate into their business interactions.

  7. 4 out of 5

    Jack

    There's some really useful tips in this book for people looking to better their career. Bits were repeated but the points made by Shari Hurley were clear and concise. It aids you to build healthy working relationships with colleagues and to beat the status quo of not wanting to deal with those awkward colleagues. Definitely worth a read. There's some really useful tips in this book for people looking to better their career. Bits were repeated but the points made by Shari Hurley were clear and concise. It aids you to build healthy working relationships with colleagues and to beat the status quo of not wanting to deal with those awkward colleagues. Definitely worth a read.

  8. 5 out of 5

    John Shoemaker

    Excellent book on how to communicate with others and and the importance of interpersonal awareness. I found some of the advice a bit unrealistic, but nevertheless, I appreciated the emphasis on candor. A powerful read.

  9. 5 out of 5

    Rozlyn Drew

    Loved this book! I believe this book contains the information and tools to become a better leader, coworker, or employee. A must read for any aspiring supervisor, manager, or director.

  10. 4 out of 5

    Mia Facchini

    Great for all business professionals looking to improve their communication skills. This book is straightforward and addresses some pressing issues in a candid way. Many of the concepts can be applied to any relationship.

  11. 4 out of 5

    Jill Strain

    Very pragmatic and insightful lessons are presented here. Highly recommend for anyone in a business relationship (so everyone). Plan on reaching out the author to do on site training with my department. Quick and easy read so that would earn a 6th star. TY Mia for the suggestion.

  12. 4 out of 5

    David Zerangue

    A practical book. Fast read. Would recommend extracting the ‘steps’ from the book for easy reference and access in your workplace.

  13. 5 out of 5

    Sadie

    Didn’t tell me anything that life experience hasn’t

  14. 4 out of 5

    Jon

    A few good ideas but poorly written.

  15. 5 out of 5

    Care

    Practical guide and step-by-step examples for having every kind of challenging conversation.

  16. 5 out of 5

    Christina

    This book gives practical and applicable advice for how to get the most out of your relationships at work and how to have candid and effective conversations.

  17. 5 out of 5

    G utf

    really loved the step by step guidance this author provided. Will apply it asap!

  18. 4 out of 5

    Alexandra

    A must-read for every manager. Or for an employee - regardless of how high up in the food chain you are, there is a lot to learn from this book. Some excellent, practice-oriented advice on getting and giving feedback with a central theme: sincerity in business relationships. I wish I could give this book to each one of my previous bosses (and probably to some future ones, too).

  19. 4 out of 5

    Soundview Executive Book Summaries

    How to Say Anything to Anyone: A Guide to Building Business Relationships That Really Work by Shari Harley was chosen by Soundview Executive Book Summaries as one of the Top 30 Business Books of 2013. THE SOUNDVIEW REVIEW: Sometimes getting what you want is simply a matter of knowing the right way to ask for it. However, if your organization suffers from a chronic case of broken lines of communication, it’s unlikely that you’ll produce the results you desire. The nature of today’s organizations re How to Say Anything to Anyone: A Guide to Building Business Relationships That Really Work by Shari Harley was chosen by Soundview Executive Book Summaries as one of the Top 30 Business Books of 2013. THE SOUNDVIEW REVIEW: Sometimes getting what you want is simply a matter of knowing the right way to ask for it. However, if your organization suffers from a chronic case of broken lines of communication, it’s unlikely that you’ll produce the results you desire. The nature of today’s organizations requires leaders to be able to speak with every level of the company. Author, speaker and consultant Shari Harley reveals that the secret to improved communication starts with improving your relationships. She offers advice to take charge of your company and your career in her book How to Say Anything to Anyone: A Guide to Building Business Relationships That Really Work. This title is now available for download as a Soundview Executive Book Summary. One of the strengths of Harley’s book is its incorporation of all rungs of the corporate ladder. By including the subject of managing up, she takes readers into an area for which there is great interest but little published material. How to Say Anything to Anyone offers one of the more accurate assessments of the need for the cultivation and maintenance of relationships across a company. For example, Harley describes the limited view employees and managers have of other departments. This creates its own level of tension that increases when we ourselves are misunderstood. She writes, “We just expect people to know why we do what we do and to follow our rules … In the absence of knowledge, people fill in the gaps. And it’s never good. Give more information than you think you need to give.” How to Say Anything to Anyone offers a balanced approach to improving communication by first improving relationships. Strengthening each part creates a solid, successful whole. Harley’s system for improvement, drawn from real-life examples, will benefit executives seeking to renew their workplace communications. Soundview's 8-page Executive Book Summary of How to Say Anything to Anyone is available here.

  20. 4 out of 5

    Joannah Keats

    This review refers to the NetGalley edition of this title. I have worked in outside sales nearly my entire adult life, working remotely from home rather than coming into an office every day. Most of my co-workers are people I see only a few times per year at company meetings and I could count on one hand the number of times I have spent a day one-on-one with a supervisor. I requested this title on NetGalley because I find the politics in outside sales positions to be much more delicate than in o This review refers to the NetGalley edition of this title. I have worked in outside sales nearly my entire adult life, working remotely from home rather than coming into an office every day. Most of my co-workers are people I see only a few times per year at company meetings and I could count on one hand the number of times I have spent a day one-on-one with a supervisor. I requested this title on NetGalley because I find the politics in outside sales positions to be much more delicate than in other environments because of the lack of in-person communication between employees. It turns out that this book is about exactly that - fostering and maintaining good quality relationships within a company, not necessarily outside of it (although the same principles would apply.) Shari Harley has written a concise, helpful guide to candor: use tactful honesty to become the kind of person that others want to work with. Harley provides plenty of short, interesting, and relevant anecdotes to demonstrate examples of how things can go wrong or right in the workplace. She uses humor with a light touch and somewhat sparingly, just enough to subtly entertain you without undermining her credibility as an expert. As I was reading I found myself thinking "I wish I could meet this woman. I would love to take one of her trainings" and considered sending along the information about this book to my supervisors to get their thoughts. In the beginning pages, you might find yourself (as I did), rolling your eyes and saying "Yeah yeah, ask for what you want and do it nicely, blah blah blah," because it seems as though she has written a book for the common-sense impaired. But if you stick with it, you'll soon see that Harley has given us what I call "a lightbulb book" - one that shines a brand new light on those dusty corners of your mind that hold information that you SHOULD be using, but aren't. If you have read "Raving Fans" you will know exactly what I mean by this description; "do everything you can to make a customer happy and they will keep coming back" - what? No kidding! You don't say! And yet, if you read that book you probably walked away inspired to do just that. This is that kind of book. Shari Harley will make you WANT to have better relationships at work.

  21. 4 out of 5

    Deborah Shapiro

    An Engaging Read That is Extraordinarily Actionable! The need for candid conversations within business is apparent. So why are so few happening? In How to Say Anything to Anyone, Shari Harley unravels this mystery and powerfully conveys both an easy to replicate formula and compelling “why” for delivering candid conversations. As a 20 year HR veteran, I have personally seen the detrimental effects that forgoing these conversations can have.It is LOADED with practical, useful, and easy to apply ge An Engaging Read That is Extraordinarily Actionable! The need for candid conversations within business is apparent. So why are so few happening? In How to Say Anything to Anyone, Shari Harley unravels this mystery and powerfully conveys both an easy to replicate formula and compelling “why” for delivering candid conversations. As a 20 year HR veteran, I have personally seen the detrimental effects that forgoing these conversations can have.It is LOADED with practical, useful, and easy to apply gems that walk you step-by-step through the process of setting up and delivering effective communications to literally anyone! This book is a must read for employees who want to excel in their current role and stand out from the pack, new employees and hiring managers who want start things off on the right foot, managers who want to ensure their team’s success, and in turn, their own, leaders or team members who have ever been challenged with giving feedback that makes a difference, and sales people who want to impact their bottom line. While I am aware that the book was written for application within a business setting, I found my thoughts drifting to those conversations that were still outstanding with my brother, my friends, my parents or my boyfriend. I could see how using these tools and principles within my own personal relationships would have a significant impact. The truth of the matter is - How to Say Anything to Anyone is a fitting title and is a must read for ANYONE who wishes to make ANY relationship productive.

  22. 4 out of 5

    Linda Dickson

    I received this book free from Goodreads First Reads. This book is as delightful to read as it is informative. As a business curriculum designer for a large corporation, I highly recomment this book for any level of employee or corporate leader. In the corporate world of email overload, it is so easy to forget how to interact with other coworkers face to face in a polite and meaniful way. Most young workers have been immersed in the world of texting, emails and voicemail. Their experience in fac I received this book free from Goodreads First Reads. This book is as delightful to read as it is informative. As a business curriculum designer for a large corporation, I highly recomment this book for any level of employee or corporate leader. In the corporate world of email overload, it is so easy to forget how to interact with other coworkers face to face in a polite and meaniful way. Most young workers have been immersed in the world of texting, emails and voicemail. Their experience in face to face communication with coworkers is often lacking in finesse and the candid exchange of information. This book explores and clarifies how to deal with a large variety of workplace interactions that could turn into "situations" when handled incorrectly. It should become required reading for young new hires, seasoned workers and leadership alike.

  23. 4 out of 5

    Susanna Fantich

    I found it quite insightful and a much needed tool for dealing with today's world where business decisions are made and broken in an instant. It was common sense stuff, but the kind of "stuff" that often gets overlooked and really shouldn't. There are parts that I found to be overly repetitive , but that may have been for the sake of drilling the exercises into the reader to make sure we got it. All in all, I enjoyed the author's sharing of her personal business mishaps because it showed she's j I found it quite insightful and a much needed tool for dealing with today's world where business decisions are made and broken in an instant. It was common sense stuff, but the kind of "stuff" that often gets overlooked and really shouldn't. There are parts that I found to be overly repetitive , but that may have been for the sake of drilling the exercises into the reader to make sure we got it. All in all, I enjoyed the author's sharing of her personal business mishaps because it showed she's just a flawed human like the rest of us, learning by trial and error, and it was her experiences that gave her the wisdom to write this book. It was well done and I read it in one night, but the things I learned from it will stay with me forever. Thank you, Shari.

  24. 5 out of 5

    Pam

    An excellent book about communication. Communication is not just about right now, but it requires preparation in advance so that great communication and necessary conversations can take place. As the author shares in a very easy-to-read style you really can talk to just about anyone about just about anything, even generally difficult subjects, as long as you set the stage for the conversation in advance. Shari Harley tells the reader how in this well-written book. This book should serve as a mus An excellent book about communication. Communication is not just about right now, but it requires preparation in advance so that great communication and necessary conversations can take place. As the author shares in a very easy-to-read style you really can talk to just about anyone about just about anything, even generally difficult subjects, as long as you set the stage for the conversation in advance. Shari Harley tells the reader how in this well-written book. This book should serve as a must-read, especially for those new to management, but it is a truly valuable read for anyone.

  25. 5 out of 5

    Craig Amason

    I have read several books on communication, but this is not one of the best. It mostly addresses how to use communication to form and strengthen relationships in the workplace. Some of the suggestions are bit unrealistic, even naive. Readers will, however, find good advice on maneuvering through the rough waters of office politics, peer-to-peer relations, and how to deal with supervisors and employers.

  26. 5 out of 5

    Michelle

    I won this in a FR giveaway. This is really easy to read and to the point. The author provides useful information that can easily be applied to your life. This is definitely aimed more for business relationships and not personal relationships though. This is a handy book for people who are looking to build better business relationships.

  27. 4 out of 5

    Aaron Lebeouf

    How to Say Anything to Anyone is a book of exceptional clarity and common sense. It provides a map to navigate the interpersonal "rapids" of business by using simple and effective communication techniques. I especially appreciate the practical step-by-step instructions for conducting sensitive conversations. How to Say Anything to Anyone is a book of exceptional clarity and common sense. It provides a map to navigate the interpersonal "rapids" of business by using simple and effective communication techniques. I especially appreciate the practical step-by-step instructions for conducting sensitive conversations.

  28. 4 out of 5

    Chade66

    I have mixed feeling about this book. I got some small pieces of useful information, but it seemed as though the author spent a terrific amount of time hopping from one job to another rather than working through her communication issues. While the emphasis on feedback was fine, I do not think that feedback is the great panacea that she holds it out to be. Best part, it is a quick, light read.

  29. 4 out of 5

    Alan E

    This review has been hidden because it contains spoilers. To view it, click here. This book is all about honest communication and giving/receiving p feedback in the workplace. It also gives tips about what to do and what not to do in order to build healthy relationships. All in all, not a lot of new things here, since a lot of the books of this kind are sort of repetitive, or, better said, mention things that most people already know intuitively.

  30. 4 out of 5

    Steph

    This is not a typical book I would read, but I was lucky enough to get it as a first reads. I felt this book had some pretty good advice. Like all books in this genre, I felt it could have gotten to the point a lot quicker, but that is my personal bias. I prefer direct and to the point.

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